I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
