So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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