That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Randomize
