he shaved USA in his pubs
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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