K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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