There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
