So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Randomize