More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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