Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
