So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
