Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
