I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I've blown a few things in my day
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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