Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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