he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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