she looked like the bat from fern gully.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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