youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
