Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize