Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
