I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
