this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
