I can tuck mytits in my pants
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
