Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
