Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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