i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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