I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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