it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
