I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
