I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
We are two peas in an std pod
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
