My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
