Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
