sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
accomplished twins. life is a go
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
