you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize
