i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
