All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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