I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize
