Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
