That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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