Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize