Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
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