So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize