sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
