Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I think my vagina is haunted
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
