Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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