im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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