For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Randomize
