shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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