It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
