I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
