The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
