guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
